Parenting versus Grand-parenting

BirthAnnouncement

My Christmas present in 2012 announcing I will be a grandma!

It’s so interesting how the cycle of life works. We know it’s best the way it is, but we’ve noticed a few things as we have now spent so much time with our daughter and son-in-law. BTW, he’s the BEST as he never complains about us spending to much time with our daughter and grandsons.

While I think most parents do think a little about the day they may become grandparents, we never really dwelled on it or pressured our daughter. Although we may have mentioned once or twice that we were getting older and may not have much energy to be grandparents. Maybe, maybe not….guess I need to ask her.

They caught us by surprise by giving us the news via a Christmas present. The “I love Grandma” bib. Needless to say, I cried and my husband was speechless!  Fast forward two years, and we are absolutely ga ga over our now two year old grandson. He’s so much fun and we love looking at the world through his eyes. And the fact that he loves us so much in return, by asking for us (he’s been known to stand at the closed door and shout our names, hoping we will appear) and running to us when we come over is just icing on the cake.

Then last Christmas, we had another surprise announcement! Our 18 month old grandson came running out of the other room wearing this tee-shirt!

BigBrother

AH, more tears!!! And now we have been blessed with our second grandson. We are a bit nervous, do we have the energy for two rambunctious little ones?

I always thought I was destined to be a career woman, but I did want a child. So I asked my barren aunt who had a career but no children, what was her opinion was about having a career but no children. She said it was awful and to absolutely have a child! Of course, my mom encouraged me as well. But she was a stay at home mom and I just didn’t think she understood about a career. Sadly, my aunt died soon after she gave me the advice. But I also became pregnant right away. I wanted to name my daughter after her, but at the time, Esther was not very popular. Oh, how short sighted I was as now there are a few VERY special young women in my life named Esther. And of course, I love the book of Esther in the Bible. Most famous line from her life was her Uncle Mordecai told her,  “And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” Esther 4:14

Throughout my career, a number of young women had the same conversation with me and I highly encouraged them to have a child, two is even better. You see, I made it impossible to have another one when I hit the age of 35. So I lived to regret that decision. Anyway, a number of babies have been born thanks to my encouragement.

But one friend didn’t take my advice. She was very justified in her thoughts, but 30 year later, she now lives to regret her decision as she watches me with my grandsons. Next post will be on making decisions….how do we make such decisions and not have to live to regret them?

Sorry, I digressed! Our observation between parenting and grand parenting is we now have the extra money AND time to lavish our grandchildren. When you are younger and during your child-bearing years, you don’t seem to have enough money nor extra time to focus purely on your child. Granted, the mundane issues of life can be overwhelming: laundry, house cleaning, yard work, paying bills, doctor/dentist appointments, grocery shopping, returning items you bought that were broken, etc. So after you retire, guess what, you still have all of these same things. But the joke amongst us retires is that we wonder, how did we ever have time to work? And now, instead of working, we have time to focus on our grandchildren.

Now, those few spare hours after all the mundane tasks, we can focus our attention on our grandson 100%. I use the singular tense as our new grandson is only days old! But here is the rub. We don’t have the energy to be able to focus 100% 24/7. We did keep our VERY active toddler grandson for two days and two nights.  And that is why God does have the younger generation having the babies and allowing us older folks to just enjoy them!

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Number 1 Grandson’s second birthday

Our blessing after an upside and downside life, from Job 12:13
β€œTrue wisdom and real power belong to God; from Him we learn how to live, and also what to live for.”

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4 thoughts on “Parenting versus Grand-parenting

  1. Thanks so much for sharing, Debbie. What a beautiful tribute to life and love. I do hope to have kids of my own someday. I don’t know if it’s God’s will. At 31 I’m starting to wonder, but I’m committed to leaving it in God’s hands. I’d rather be single and completely sold out to God than married to a man who doesn’t love God with all his heart. God will bring us together if that is his will. In the mean time I’m celebrating the blessing of these two little lives that you get to spoil and dote on. πŸ™‚ Brings a smile to my face every time I read your posts about this. I worked with abused kids long enough to really feel nothing but joy every time a child is loved the way they ought to be, God bless you, Debbie. You’ll never know what a gift you are to these little ones or to their parents. πŸ™‚

    • I have a beautiful young friend whose sold out to the Lord as you are. She’s 32. She’d love to marry and have children but like you, just never met the right person.
      I know not everyone can or will have children….but you can always have spiritual children! You inspire me so much! I wanted to tag you to help with my current post about my pet peeve….but I felt compelled to get it out there. I did put a link in it to a very well thought out post from the Biblical perspective. I contacted the writer to just reblog it. He never wrote back. I could have quoted him more….but I just wanted to air my personal thoughts. And now a young cousin has been offended by it since she and her husband use cuss words. She has two daughters and really got mad when I asked if she allows them to use cuss words. Ouch!
      I think it’s a spiritual void….
      I was in law enforcement but started out as a juvenile Probation Officer. I’ve seen the seedy side of life all too much. And under it, I saw a lot of drug and alcohol abuse and of course, much cursing. And these people were lost so I prayed for all of them as well as was an encourager.
      And I want to encourage this young cousin….

      • Something that the world doesn’t understand is that, sometimes, true love means that you care enough to say or do the unpopular thing. Folks like yourself in public service are usually in it to help people, even though sometimes that help hurts. I think it was Max Lucado who said that God loves us just the way we are, but he loves us too much to leave us like that. When we love others like Christ, sometimes that means rocking the boat. Looking forward to reading that article. I’m playing catch up after my mom came down sick, but thankfully she’s starting to mend. Thanks for sharing your heart, Debbie. You’re such a blessing. πŸ™‚

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